HATE IT REALLY ! ! ! ! ! !

I don't know why. It is getting often n often day by day. I cannot resist the pain feeling in my heart anymore. I don't know why but I should not let it come from my mouth. But really for now, I hate my mom. Since my brother came back from Singapore. She has changed. She prefers my brother than me. Well, I know that she prefers my brother than me, but I think it stopped already since my brother departed from Jakarta. Hmm..I'm really sick of it. I don't know what should I do. Just now I argued with her. This argument only because of choosing fitness center. She and I has our own opinion. I don't know! Why should this happen to me. It's like I'm the unwanted daughter. Those who meet me at school everyday must be don't believe in me. I know. From my outside appearance I'm a cheerful person. Always smile and never seemed to be sad. Today also,my mom let my brother use the car to go with his friend that mostly will be his girlfriend. I sacrificed a lot just because to let him go with that stupid girl. I carpooled with my friend to go home afterschool eventhough actually he can pick me up before he go. Second thing was I missed my tuition lesson that for me it is really important because my IGCSE is coming soon. What was shocking is that my mom didn't angry even a little bad mood because I skipped my tuition. Usually even because I was sick my mom still angry because of skipping my tuition. Next peculiar thing is, whenever I use the car to go somewhere, she must be saying to me that I couldn't pick up my friends and drop by my friends because nowadays the petrol price is rising. I know the reason is reasonable. I obey her. I never pivk up nor drop by my friends even their house is next to my house. Everytime he uses the car my mom will let him do what he wants to do. Including come back late at night, drop n pick up friends, spend a lot of money, etc. When my dad start complaining why he came back late at night my mom will cover up his mistake. She will always try to make my brother be the king in the house. No special occasion he can get the best outfit in town that is cost really high. If me, just when there is a special occasion then I can get my new outfit. Well, it's not the best in town. Just as cheapest as it can be. I never complained. I accepted it with smile plastered in my face. He got what he wants, the most expensive laptop, the latest iPod [eventhough mine is still the first generation of iPod], and the most luxury item in his hand and on his body. I will never get that. I have no friends to chat with about this problem.I never complained about this. Even when I was awarded to be the second rank in whole level, she didn't praise me, she just looked at my certificate and put it back. But when my brother got 100 for his maths test, she was like want to tell everybody in this world that he got 100 for maths test. Do you think it is fair enough for me. Everyday must be the time when I argue with him or my mom. My life will be worsen. I don't know hot to solve it anymore. Disaster will come when I was around him or my mom. Hurts me a lot ! !